Kelsey Bachinski

A Simple Moment

A Simple Decision

 A Simple CHANGE 

Have you ever thought about whether or not you are living to your fullest? I know 19 months ago I really pushed myself to explore that question.  I had wondered what would truly make me happy.
What would make my life feel like it was WORTHY!

It was at this time I began to make healthier choices, to focus on positive image and being workout.  I began making more healthy choices and taking the time TO LEARN about being healthy.  THIS was the first moment where I saw a SHIFT in my life.  I began to see my life in a different light - a life that had more meaning, more adventure, and more happiness.  I began to see that I truly had abilities and skills that I could offer the world.

 It was here that I saw the impact that one person could have on someone's life.  My coach, Sarah, had made a simple transformation picture on Facebook.  A picture of here in a bikini on day one of her at home fitness journey and then again 30 days later.  You see, prior to this I had been a Negative Nancy.  I had thought that people posting pictures in bikini's were being inappropriate, desperate for attention, and plan old BRAGGING.  Furthermore, if they were talking about fitness and their body it made  me even more MAD.  I wanted to jump through the computer and tell them to STOP pushing their life and their success down my throat.  BUT --- then came along Sarah.  She made this simple post with a before and after picture.  For some reason, on this particular day I made the decision to READ what she had to say.  I made the decision NOT to judge a photo but to see what the MEANING was behind the photo.  This day simply CHANGED my life.


This was the day were I experienced my first mindset shift, my first "midlife" crisis GAME CHANGER, my first Awh-ha moment.....     This was the day that I realized that it isn't about SHOWING YOUR BODY OFF!  IT is about looking in the mirror and saying, I am beautiful, I am worthy, I am happy.  So often we look at people's picture's, snap chat's, clothing, etc.. and we instantly go to a place of judging or selfish comparisons.  Now I can't speak for everyone, but I can speak for myself and on the experiences I  have had with others.  Most people look at a bikini picture and think, "WHAT is she trying to prove?",  "That shouldn't be ALLOWED on Facebook!" , "She is a mother, what kind of role model is she setting?!"   NOW before we get in a debate I want to say --- I get it.  I have had these moments.  I have experienced these thoughts.  I have wanted to say these things.  Heck I HAVE SAID these things.

BUT here is what I have learnt --- too often we are so quick to judge people's pictures, blogs, the news, people's story's, or the way people present themselves.  We often forget to take a moment and see the other person's perspective.  We even forget that this experience that the other person is providing us with could be teaching us something!

Let's go back to my experience with my own coach.  I could have looked at her picture and thought the EXACT same thoughts that I had previously had with all of my other Facebook friends.  BUT for some reason I made a decision to look at her perspective and what she had to say first.  Once I had read what she had to say I saw her picture in a completely different light.  From this day on, I look at women's body image, societal appearance, and the view of men and women's gender roles COMPLETELY different BECAUSE I made the decision to stop, read, reflect, and understand.


As I was reading in the book, The Gifts of Imperfection, Brene discuss's her OWN experience with taking herself out of her previous notions and just letting herself be apart of a new experience.  You see Brene had spent her entire career writing books and speaking on behalf of orderly behaviours, creating your success systematically, and raising to the top by BEING in control. Throughout this journey she FORGOT to take into consideration the variable of heart, compassion, and love.  She forgot to think about the other side of things and found herself falling into a DEEP whole of self doubt.   She had wondered how even her own academic advice that she had spent her whole life working on was failing her.  The moment she decided to look at something she once saw as BAD and  look at it in a new light, was the moment that her life changed forever.   Brene said, I learned how to worry more abouth ow I felt and less about 'what people might thing.'.

It is so powerful to think that only you TRULY can determine how you see yourself. Feeling happy, confident, and proud of who you are, what you do and how you look only REALLY matters to YOU.

In fact, her is what she had to say:  "I now see how owning our story and loving ourselves through that process is the bravest thing that we will ever do.  I now see that cultivating a Wholehearted life is not like trying to reach a destination. It's like walking toward a star in the sky.  We never really arrive, but we certainly know that we're heading in the right direction."


So today I challenge you to write down who you are, what you value, and where you want to be.  Do those things align?